A Good Friday = 22

I forgot it was my birthday until Thursday. This can only mean one thing, I'm becoming old(er). I guess it's because nothing exciting happens after you turn 21. You can rent a car at 25, but that's basically all I can think of. So I didn't really do much on the day of my birthday. But there was something else really special about my birthday this year. For the first time, my birthday landed on Good Friday.

Realizing this, I was humbled. Sure it's my birthday, even though I almost forgot. But this day is celebrated for a different reason. It's celebrated as the biggest event that eternally changed the history of mankind.

So I thought of two things. (1) I'm glad to have my birthday on Good Friday because it makes my day twice as special. (2) I'm kind of not glad my birthday is on Good Friday because my birthday is less significant than what Christ did for the world.

Like I said, my day wasn't too special. I ran a few errands, went to Good Friday service, and had a fun night with some of the guys. It was a good, simple day. I greatly appreciated the fact that God didn't allow my day to be crazy with surprises and events. He allowed it to be simple so that I could think about the most important thing of that day.

Yes, it was my birthday. But more importantly, it was the day that the world was given access to eternal life. Every birthday would be meaningless if it weren't for Christ's death on the cross on Good Friday. Why celebrate birthdays if you're celebrating a day closer to eternal death and suffering? But because of what happened on Good Friday, I was (and now) am able to celebrate my birthdays as a day closer to eternal life and everlasting joy.

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Living Out Boldly

A lot of things have come into my life, and it's disrupted the expected trajectory of my life. I think of it as approaching a fork in the road of life -- or having large boulder drop into a still lake. Everything was going smoothly until something appeared out of nowhere. However, this isn't a bad type of disruption. It's a good one.

I'm still in the process of comprehending all that has happened to me within the past year. But I thought I'd write down my thinking process. A year ago, I would have never thought I would enjoy reading or writing. I would have never thought that I would have a craving to tell stories and capture images. I would have never thought that I would meet people who are highly esteemed. I would have never thought that those people would be willing to mentor me. All these things disrupted my expected course in life.

So here I am, trying to process what all of this means. What is God trying to say? What am I supposed to do? What if it doesn't work out? What if. What if. What if...

1) The Bible says not to worry about the future. 
It's a long ways away. Focus on the present moment. Enjoy what you have today. Be thankful in the current circumstance. Even the Lord's prayer tells us that God will provide us our daily bread. Although, it is difficult to fight this mindset when the problems of the real world constantly surround us. It's all about taking "one step, one punch, and one round at a time." Yes, I just quoted Creed. It's a great movie.

2) As Christians, we should be living boldly - not fearfully. 
I spoke with my pastor about my current dilemma. And he mentioned how frustrating it is to see Christians living with doubt/fear/worry. If you are sure in where you are being led, then why fear the unknown? Of course, it's natural to fear the unknown. But we should be bold, knowing that Christ has led us and will lead us for the rest of our days.

Am I certain that I'm being led in this direction? If so, then I should follow it boldly. If not, then I should wait patiently. Maybe I already know the answer. Maybe I'm just looking for others to tell me the answer I already know. I don't know. Yes? Yes. Maybe. No.

I need more prayer. Peace out.

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Just For My Own Record

I want to record a brief summary of how crazy my life has been the past year. This isn't for me to brag about how I accomplished such and such. This more of a testament of how good He is to me, despite my shortcomings. Also, I want to look back on this post one day and see how far I've come.

Summer 2015
I became interested in photography. Learned all the technical basics and began to venture out into this creative world. While learning, I saw an application for the Jubilee Project Fellowship. I applied and didn't think I would get in. I got in, and I still don't know how.

I met a lot of amazing people with awesome gifts/talents. I was introduced to a whole new world of thinking, and it changed the way I now think. And this was all through God.

Fall 2015
I came back to school, craving a way to stay active in this new mindset. I began to write scripts, create videos, and take photos. But I still wondered if this discovery was just a temporary interest or a God-given passion.

But even as I wondered, opportunities continued to come about. I became a photojournalist for Humans of Austin. I helped film a music video for a band. But one event blew my mind. I learned that my accounting program finished developing a summer program in LA for accountants to work within film companies. The program had been in the works for a few years, but it just so happened to be ready at this moment. So of course, I applied.

Winter 2015
I read a lot over break - like a lot. I hate reading, but I began to enjoy it the more I read. This was definitely not my own doing, as funny as that may sound. At the same time, I worked my accounting internship with Ernst and Young. I learned how to learn, and I was challenged in so many different ways - mentally and spiritually. All the while, I wrote scripts in my free time and read a lot of books.

Spring 2016
I finish my internship and hear back from the LA summer program. I receive an internship offer with Disney as a production accountant. I so happened to buy tickets to LA way before any of this. So I visit Walt Disney Studios while seeing friends in LA - who graciously took time out of their day to see me.

I head back to Austin for a church retreat and have an amazing time there (that's another post for another time). I come back from retreat and get a phone call to help make a video for Billboard. I didn't really know what to expect, but I finished it that night. Surprisingly, the people liked the way I made it. And now I'm about to start school.

These are way too many coincidences to be called coincidences. This is God at work in my life. And I have done nothing to deserve this. I'm a broken person, who disobeys God just like everyone else in this world. Throughout this journey, I have worried for no reason. Other times, I had become prideful at the thought of going into the film industry. And yet, He's willing to use me.

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Lesson from the first sixth of 2016

Two months of 2016 have already gone by. What have you guys learned about yourselves? About God? About life? I hope we're all learning in someway - whether it be from school or life experiences. Because to me, time is becoming more and more limited. I feel as if my life is passing by at an accelerating rate. Each year goes by faster than the previous one. And that mentality has benefited me. However, it has also restricted me.

I believe it's important for us to always remember that our time on earth is limited. 80ish years may seem like a long time, and it can be a long time. But I try to always put it in relativity to an eternity. I love how Francis Chan puts this concept with an illustration (I'll link the video below).

This mindset has made me think about investing my time in the most efficient/effective way possible. I'm always challenging myself to be "doing" something. And I end up hating myself when a day has been "wasted".

But here's my problem: I've been so caught up with finding my purpose in God that I lost sight of God himself. I forgot about His commands to serve, rest, and fellowship. So instead of being content in God, I worried about things way into the future.

Someone shared this illustration with me. The life that we walk with God is like driving at night. Our headlights show only what's immediately ahead. But it won't show what's a couple miles ahead. The road may curve later down the road. But why worry about it when you're not even close? Everything in life is unpredictable. Changes happen. Nothing is stable. But He's stable. He's constant. His unchanging love is predictable.

And when you learn to let go, He responds in a crazy way. Sometimes it's immediately. Other times, it may take a while.

But Godliness with contentment is great gain. - 1 Timothy 6:6

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