I lean not on my own understanding.

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight." - Proverbs 3:5-6

It's been a while since I wrote, and there were many reasons for it. I feel like many of you have been feeling the same way that I've been feeling. Empty. Confused. Blank. For me, I came to think about what I'm doing in college. Of course, I'm here to study and work diligently to glorify God. But then again, what am I actually DOING doing? What am I doing with my degree/major? Why am I even pursuing a Masters in Accounting?

For the past few weeks, I'd sit in class wondering why I'm learning this stuff. I wasn't finding any joy in it. And of course, not everything in class is enjoyable or fun. But you know what I mean. How is learning Financial Accounting Standards, Market Equilibrium Hypothesis, or US GAAP going to help me serve God's kingdom? I'm not even enjoying this.

In addition, I don't see myself doing anything in a large corporation. How am I supposed to impact and influence those around me if I'm going to be another small worker in a huge company? Am I really going to be a "slave" at a company for 2 years, working 70-90+ hours? I can't see myself doing that. Some people don't mind that because they'll make a lot of money or gain the experience to obtain a CEO position. No thank you. I don't really care for that stuff. I rather make less money, knowing that I'm making a difference in glorifying God.

So anyway, you get my point. All these thoughts have been in my head. Then this passage in Proverbs became so clear. Who am I to try and figure out what I'm supposed to make of my life? I can try to plan stuff out and convince myself of the purpose that I have, or I can leave it up to the guy who made me. But, honestly, it's so difficult to follow that simple command.

"Then they asked him, 'What must we do to do the works God requires?^' Jesus answered, 'The work of God is this: to believe in the one he has sent.'” - John 6:28-29

I've been so busy trying to DO stuff. I don't know why, but I have a mindset of having to complete at least one task to glorify God. If I don't DO anything for God today, then I failed. And that's false. Look at the passage. The people are so focused on figuring out what they need to DO for God. We've been raised in society to always be DOING stuff.

But Jesus responds in a way that confuses us, and makes us a bit frustrated. Jesus says to just BELIEVE and TRUST. The people were thinking, "What?.... No Jesus, what do you want me to DO? I believe in you and all, and that's cool. But what do you want me to DO?" But that's exactly what we are to do. Just BELIEVE and TRUST.

That's something I'm still learning to do. It's weird because that's now how we were raised and taught. But it's that simple. Believe and trust that He will make your paths straight and your mind clear. You don't need to worry about what's out of your control. Just pray, read scripture, and ask for the wisdom to trust in Him. Who knows what I'll be doing. But I know I'll be where I need to be when the time comes.

PS: I took this idea from another Judah Smith sermon. So if you want to listen to it, message me!