1.19.14.

It's been a little over a week since a close friend has left me. She was always around all my life up until now. Unfortunately, it was time for her to go. Chocolate: my dog, my longest friend passed away on January 19, 2014. She's been around ever since I didn't really have any friends. 

I knew it was going to happen soon because she was sick all throughout winter break. But I wasn't sure if I wanted to say my goodbye as I left for another semester. I don't think I did. But hey, life happens. There's a process of life and death in this world. It's inevitable.


Last week, I didn't have much time to be sentimental. I know it's kind of sad, but I didn't have time to be sad and think about the good times. I guess now is my time to reminisce on the past. The weird thing is, I'm not all that depressed or sad that she's gone. And by no means am I trying to say that I don't care. I do.

I didn't really know how to react when I heard the news from my dad. All I knew was that I had too many things going on. I didn't have time to sit and think. So I tried to suppress those feelings in me for the time being. I held them in as long as I could up until I came to prayer meetings during the week. From that moment, when I started praising and praying, I began to ask God to let me see the good in what may seem bad. I asked for this burden of mixed feelings to disappear. Amazingly, it did.

You see, what's done is done. You can't change the past. Of course, everyone knows that. Even though this event is unfortunate, God showed me the urgency we need in our lives. Our lives our short. Dogs' lives are shorter.

Some of you may be thinking, "how can you NOT be sad, and how are you so emotionless?" It's not that I'm not sad or depressed or angry, I choose not to pursue those emotions. They lead to nothing. Instead, I think about how there wouldn't be death at all if sin had never distorted the truth and this world. That's what keeps me going; I want expose the truth that has been distorted by sin.

{ Continue Reading... }

New Year Resolution: 2014

I know most people make a new year resolution, but no one ever lives up to it. By week 3-5, I notice people giving up. For example, you'll see a large number of people running across campus during the beginning of the semester. However, if you wait a few weeks, the number starts dwindling down.

Let's hope I can make my resolutions a life long habit.

• Finish the rest of the Bible (the old testament). I finished the new testament last year.

• Focus on learning and becoming more educated for His kingdom. NOT MY GPA.

• Read up on daily news: world, US, tech stuff, etc.

• Start disciplining myself by working out, again. I took a long enough break from finals.

• Finally, make time to meet people more often. This will probably be the most difficult one of them all.

 Here we go.

{ Continue Reading... }

2014: Beginning with United Worship

It's hard to believe that it is already 2014. A new year has started, but it feels as if nothing around me has changed. However, I guess change starts from within and by Him.

I started this year by serving as a "shepherd" at the United Worship youth retreat. In other words, I was a counselor for youth aged kids. More specifically, I was a leader of a group of 9th graders. At first, I was hesitant and worried about being a mentor for these kids. I have no experience as a teacher/mentor whatsoever. There was nothing I could do to prepare for the discussions and meetings we would have. On top of that, I heard stories of some of the kids being crazy/wild. 

"They're going to keep you awake all night."

"They always run around and get you in trouble for not being with them."

"They don't listen. You need to make sure they stay awake during the messages."

These were some of the things I heard from previous counselors. So I was a bit worried about the situation I put myself into. Just a bit.
The day finally came where I met my group. They were a normal looking bunch. We introduced each other. I set some ground rules of respecting one another, and I gave them all the freedom they wanted. No strict rules. Surprisingly this method worked. There was never a time when I lectured a member. I never had to "chase" them down. They respected me the way I respected their maturity and responsibility. Simple. There you have it. Everything went smoothly. No arguments. No complaints. Nothing. Only one guy to thank for this, and He's the one who made everything.

My only regret was not getting closer to my group. But despite my failure to do so, they still grew spiritually in so many ways. Their level of passion for Christ in prayer and worship was unbelievable. The best part is that I had nothing to do with it. I know, for a fact, that there was nothing that I did to make any of that happen. I boast in my weakness and flaws to verify that God did all that, not me.

So there you have it. My group seemed to be perfect in every way imaginable. No crazy kids. They all grew spiritually. They all became more passionate for Christ. Best of all, I didn't do anything. I was just there to monitor and witness what God can and will do.

                                       Group B11: Issac, Bryan, Trey, Chris, Mingook, Aaron, June.

{ Continue Reading... }

End of 2013.

It's been a while since I've made post. But now that I'm done with finals and back home for break, I've had some time to relax and settle down. There's quite a lot that happened over the past month; however, I'm probably going to have to break the topics into different posts.

For those of you who don't know, I completed my first semester at McCombs. Classes were a bit more difficult than my previous year. And, unfortunately, I was not able to keep my perfect 4.0. In way, I'm thankful that I didn't receive all A's in my courses. At one point, I became arrogant and careless about my classes. I assumed that I could easily keep my perfect GPA. I was proven wrong. God humbled me. He showed me how much I really need to rely on Him in everything I do. No matter how naturally talented you are at anything, that talent is worthless without Christ being centered in what you do.


Now moving on to my break so far...
I haven't done much over my break. The only thing worth mentioning is that I finished a book titled "Jesus > Religion" by Jefferson Bethke. This book is truly eye opening and honest about the radical truths about Jesus. Like I said before, there is so much to talk about in this book. So I will probably make another post specifically about this book. It is a book worth reading. It's concise, simple, and modern.
Now the other part of my break will consist of serving as a leader in a "United Worship" youth retreat. I actually attended the training session today. To be honest, I volunteered for this retreat out of obligation to serve and make some use out of my break. I didn't think much about it when I agreed to serve. But I think God is slowly showing me that this opportunity is truly a blessing to change these the lives of the youth. For some reason, however, I feel some uncomfortable, uneasy feeling about the coming weeks. Whatever that may be, I can only pray for protection and conviction through His mercy and grace.

In addition, I may attend another college ski retreat. But it depends on my physical condition. So hopefully, God will fuel me through both retreats. Anyway, I am constantly encouraged by this song to persevere and continue to pursue Him... "When my heart is torn asunder" - Phil Wickham.

{ Continue Reading... }

A mistake I'll never make again

Today, I made a decision I will regret for the rest of my life. I promise that I will never make this mistake ever again.

Now let me explain a sad truth. When you see a homeless person and a dog with them, who do you feel more pity and sympathy for? Most Americans will probably feel sorry for that poor, hungry dog. Now this is in my own opinion and from my own experiences. How disappointing is that when someone feels more sympathy for a DOG rather than a human being. Yes, it's important to care for animals and whatnot, but when did we decide that it was okay to place an animal in front of a human being?
Why do we treat homeless people like they don't exist? So what if they've made mistakes in their lives? We make mistakes all the time. Some of them may not be as fatal and detrimental; however, mistakes are mistakes. No one is perfect. What makes you better than a person on the streets? Your looks? Your financial status? Your intelligence? The fact that your mistakes weren't as "stupid" as theirs? None of this matters. We're just like them. Imperfect. Flawed. Sinful. The list can go on and on.

Now here's the mistake I made today. I was on my way to leave for a tennis match. I looked down the alley and saw a homeless man eating out of a dumpster. A dumpster. This man was so hungry that he resorted to eating scraps out of a trash bag. He's living in one of the wealthiest countries in the world. A country that has a plentiful amount of resources: food, water, electricity, etc. And he's eating out of a dumpster.
I felt disgusted in so many different ways. Not of what he was doing, but of how he was pushed to the limit and had no other choice in order to survive. What's even worse is that I got in the car and left. I didn't want to keep my friends waiting. I didn't want to be judged. I had things to do.
I made one of the biggest mistakes of my life. I let a man be humiliated in one of the worst possible ways anyone can be humiliated.

I will never make this mistake again. I will never make an excuse not to help someone in need. A few minutes of my time to help someone in a dire situation is worth more than me spending it in class, watching tv, playing games, or whatever else. And if I do fail again, I can only ask for forgiveness for not having the compassion that Christ commanded me to show to everyone.

{ Continue Reading... }

Giving.

Today was a relaxing, blessed day. Both my classes this morning were cancelled due to lack of attendance. It probably had to do with the fact that the night before was halloween. However, I went to class without knowing any of this. I guess the good thing was that my professor gave extra credit to those who still showed up to class. Since I no longer had class, I had 2 hours of free time before going to Cafe Medici.

So let's rewind as to why I planned on going to Cafe Medici. I received a free 20 dollar store credit to Cafe Medici from downloading a PayPal app. Seeing that there is no way that I can consume 20 dollars worth of coffee, I offered my college fellowship members to join me for free drinks.

Anyway, I had two hours to spend. I decided to just spend some time at the gym until it was time to meet at Cafe Medici. When I arrived there, no one showed up except for two other friends who also had store credit to spend. I didn't want to waste the opportunity to use all this free credit; so I bought 3 cokes and 3 bottles of orange juice. As I left the Cafe, I decided to just hand out all those drinks to any homeless person I saw. It just so happened that there were people right outside, and I handed them out. Those people looked so surprised and happy to see me offer them a coke.

Later that evening, I was walking towards Cabo Bob's to meet my small group to eat dinner. For those of you who don't know what Cabo Bob's is, it is a burrito restaurant that recently opened up in Austin. By the way, the food is very good (much better than Chipotle). As I approached the restaurant, a homeless man approached me and asked me for money. Unfortunately, I don't carry cash with me at all and told him that I didn't have any cash. He seemed pretty disappointed and pointed how I'm about to eat at the restaurant but can't give him any money. Without thinking, I immediately asked him if he would like me to buy him a meal. He became very ecstatic and kept asking me if "I was being serious." I said "yes."

So we walk into the restaurant, and the man introduces himself as Quinton. I respond and introduce myself. As we get in line and I ask Quinton what he wants to eat. He kept telling me how thankful he was and just told me to buy the cheapest thing.

On a sidenote, Quinton didn't seem too straight in the head, if you know what I mean. From the moment I started talking to him, he continued to talk and stutter all his words. But I could see that his excitement made him stutter even more.

I tell Quinton to get anything he wants. Just when I thought he couldn't get more crazy, his eyes open up even wider; he starts talking even faster. As he's ordering in line, he keeps telling the workers to put everything in the burrito. However, the workers were hesitant and looked to me for approval. Of course, I nodded and said yes to whatever Quinton asked for. So I finally paid at the register, and Quinton kept telling all the workers how great of a guy I am for buying him a meal and how I'm a good Christian and many more things that I can't remember. All I could remember was that everyone was smiling and cracking up. Finally, I helped Quinton fill up his drink. Now remember, he's been talking non-stop ever since I met him.

He kept talking about: how he's messed up, how he doesn't deserve this, how kind I am, how he's so thankful, etc. He began to cry. I didn't know how to respond. All I said was that he does deserve to be shown kindness. Although he may have done things in the past, that doesn't deny him from receiving kindness, mercy, and second-chances. So I asked him if I could pray for him and his meal really quickly. In his broken, emotional state, he started to kneel onto the ground. I stopped him from getting down and told him to stand as we prayed. So we prayed and said our goodbyes. Quinton kept shaking my hand and hugged me multiple times...

The only thing I could think about was why he tried to kneel before me as I asked to pray for him. I'm just as messed up as he is in different ways. I'm not a perfect person. There's no reason for anyone to kneel before me. Also, I didn't know why I offered to buy him food without any hesitation. There's no way I would offer to buy anyone food, being the selfish person I am. It's Him working within me. I hope that Quinton was impacted by Christ who inspires me to live the way I do.

 

{ Continue Reading... }

1st Semester of Sophmore Year

It's my second year at UT, my first time living off campus, and my first time being a business student. A lot has happened within the first month and a half. I guess I'll try to explain some things.

Living off campus has been such a great experience. It feels good to be able to cook my own food; however, there are many times when I have no time to cook because of school work. My roommates are great. Our place is calm and quiet, and it's a place I can actually call home. These are just a few of the many blessings I have here.

This semester, I successfully transferred into McCombs. It's really great and awesome that I am able to be a part of such a prestigious school, but there are a lot of responsibilities you are expected to fulfill. Starting this semester, I was so ready to take business classes and succeed in working my best; however, the workload slowly started piling. 

McCombs is widely known and highly looked upon. But the school doesn't have this reputation for nothing. This school throws you into the real world as soon as declare yourself a business student. This was a bit overwhelming for me, at first. There are all these expectations you are supposed to fill: getting an internship, studying abroad, joining business organizations, etc.

So this got me thinking, "I don't think I'm ready for the real world. Actually, I don't want to grow up just yet." I wanted to still be able to play and not think or worry about these things. But of course that wasn't an option. All I could do was man up and plow through it, which is what I did. I joined a business organization, I applied for a committee position, and I entered a business case competition. All my worries started to disappear and I began to meet a lot of people and start my "networking" with others. And now, I'm in a business org. and ended up winning the PwC case competition.

But here's what I came to realize after watching this video.

I'm finding myself getting caught up in all these little things: doing homework, going to business meetings, joining business events, etc. I took a step back to see what I'm doing and where it's going. I don't wanna be like the typical business person who gets caught up doing all these things because people tell me to do it. Doing all these little things will cause you to lose sight of what you're doing and where your direction in life is going. I want to do things that will let me be able to go in the right direction in glorifying God. I don't want to live a life where I ONLY drive a nice car, eat a nice restaurants, and buy things. That accomplishes nothing. I want to become an asset for others and, more importantly, for God.

So I'm going to try and always remember what I'm doing and how it's going to help me glorify God. If it can't help me grow and develop in the right way, then I need to remember to forget it, even though it may be appealing and enjoyable.

Disclaimer: that doesn't mean I'm not going to do drop homework, business orgs, etc. I just want to be conscious of what I'm doing and how it will glorify God.

{ Continue Reading... }